The
entire time I was browsing in the University Bookstore there was this drone of
conversation somewhere in the background. Sort of like Muzak, but real. I
wasn't really listening as I was lost in that sweet state of payday. You know,
that bliss that lasts for a few hours after you realize you have money again.
This first of the month I was in a deep debate in the shirt section between Me
who had a budget, and Me who wanted to splurge. I did a lot of circling back to
the rack, spinning the hangers aside and facing mirrors. I guess there's a lot
of choreography involved when I shop. I know there's a whole lot of neurotic.
Anyway, at some point between "I don't need this whatsoever" and
"I must have this now" the conversation drone got much, much louder.
I looked
over and realized it was coming from these three young men in conversation over
by the sweatpants. They seemed to be doing their own debate and dance. The tone
was somber and they looked like they might be back as alumni but not having
a good time. "....Yeah, dude, seriously, me too. I know just what you mean...Like
I wake up, like, every night...I can't sleep either and, yes, I know but it's
definitely not anxiety...it's just, I don't know.. it's got to be just life,
man, right? We got these families and kids and responsibilities and, like, I
haven't slept in like a year now and I just not sure I can take this much
longer, know what I mean?" Long pause. "Seriously dudes...I think
this means I have to let it go. I am just going to have to find a way to be
happy with only two million in savings now. I am gonna have to forget about the
million I lost so I can sleep again." We all were speechless. They in
quiet agreement and silent support; me from another planet who spoke a
different language.
I
decisively grabbed two shirts and bought them immediately, without one bit of
debate.
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